The end of last year there had been a lot of challenges at work.
It wasn’t a healthy situation to be in, and it had affected my confidence and communication.
I’d come to a low point.
So the year-end review wasn't the normal review I’d receive.
The feedback was I need to improve my communication. It wasn't a great feeling.
I took it all critically, but thought, I can't progress like this.
There were things I wanted to change . . .
I was not good at setting boundaries, people-pleasing because I felt like I’m disappointing them. Taking on more than I can chew, and wasn’t pushing back. I wanted confidence to say ‘No’ and the confidence to say why.
Also, I tended not to share my thoughts in meetings.
Although I know I’ve got something to say, I fear it might be stupid to say it.
Or, just because I'm not saying anything right now, doesn't mean I don’t have an opinion.
Or I’d just take in what people would say, and find it tiring to comment.
Instead of saying, ‘I can’t answer that right now, I need time to think about it and get back to you’.
I was just thinking, I'm not very good at feedback.
I wanted to be confident in sharing my thoughts, ideas and suggestions, rather than be an ‘order taker’.
There came a point where I felt intimidated to talk to people who've achieved so much in their life and career.
With that knock in confidence, I started comparing myself, asking ‘why am I still not at this level or why am I not getting promoted yet?’
I started to have self-doubts - What am I not doing correctly?
And also started having fear or intimidation creep in. And I didn't like that.
I was forgetting the skills and the value I bring.
I wanted to speak confidently to people in authority, be a respected Business Analyst in our firm, and get recognition.
I wanted to break free from this rut I was in, because I didn’t used to be this way.
To get my confidence back.
So that's when I started to look for some help.
As soon as I saw Matt’s website, read through all his case studies, I knew instantly I’d found the right person to work with.
But the profile of his clients were quite high level in their firm.
I wasn’t sure I could afford Matt, but reached out anyway.
We talked about the investment for the program, as that was my bottleneck, and Matt gave me the option to split payment.
It was worth the investment.
I knew the first time we spoke in our initial call, I felt the genuineness, the desire to get to know me from the start.
Matt gave time to really understand my needs, what this means for me, and the things I want to achieve.
That's what attracted me to work with him.
It's not a one size fits all coaching, so it’s an important first step to get to know each other.
Matt’s website is very clear about the programme, but in our call he fully laid out what's involved.
At the end of that call, I was 120% sure that I’d found the right person to work with.
And thankfully via Zoom, so I didn't have to travel anywhere!
I do a lot of psychology learning on YouTube which is helpful because it digs deep on your mindset.
I've seen quite a few motivational videos encouraging women to push back, ask for more and speak up.
And we’ve got a wide range of LinkedIn training at work we can access.
But it’s all videos, you’re just watching the information.
You're not having that conversation with a person during training, and with books I felt the same way.
The other thing, especially LinkedIn at work, you need to set aside time and be undistracted.
But then if you're too busy, you tend to push it out.
So I did try a few things, but as I did my search, that's when I realised there's coaching.
Not just a one-time classroom training, but somebody who will work 1:1 with me.
I know that the whole training, the way I received it in the past, was not effective enough.
I wanted something that I could progress with.
When I say progress, I wanted lasting change, transformation.
So I decided to do coaching.
I can express what I want and I’m able to share my opinions in meetings.
I feel more in charge, and I don't shy away from saying what I think.
Saying, “oh, we might need to look into this”, or “I don't think that's the way it should be done, we should be thinking about this.”
I trust what I'm saying, and say it.
This is valuable to everyone, including the stakeholder.
For me, it's a big achievement to share my opinions and my feedback as well.
Also, if I get feedback on the work I’ve done, I handle it and don’t take it as criticism.
I'm getting more respect within the circle I'm working with.
I reach out to colleagues to connect on a personal level and build relationships.
And as a result, I’m more comfortable and now work differently with them.
We even got a comment that the team really works well together, which is a big confidence booster.
Last week, I got chatting to a colleague who's also been here for 8 years.
Before, I’d shy away from talking to him, because he's quite high up, I would be comparing myself. But we were in the queue, and I just started chatting to him.
I got my confidence back because I'm able to convey if I don't understand, or need more time to think. I'm vocal about it.
I’m able to share my working knowledge, value and experience. Taking on a recent project, I realised I know more than I thought I did, more than some of the others.
One of the things I learned is using curiosity in your skill set.
To build your knowledge, be curious, and dig deep into what people are saying.
Because, if you have confidence to ask around, your knowledge grows, and you become more valuable.
It's great to know my confidence is constantly growing, not in an arrogant way, but to be able to speak to different colleagues, ask questions and build trust.
I'm so proud of what's happened in the last few months.
It was a fascinating experience that I never thought I'd encounter in communication coaching.
Because training or communication workshops are always just technical skills - about your grammar, or how you stand when doing presentations.
In a lot of communication development it’s never about your mindset, your personality, or about your character.
Whereas with Matt, that's what it's built upon.
Who are you as a person?
What are your values you lean into that would help you communicate better?
If I’d not worked with Matt, I wouldn't even think about the topics we covered as being such an important part of communication.
I wasn't expecting the topics we tackled together.
This goes deep.
I understood what Matt does, that makes the case studies read like they do.
So each new Skill Sheet between sessions, that's where all my curiosity kicked in about how it will help me.
Matt’s very calm, so working with him is easy because I can be myself, open up and I never find any difficulty sharing what I think.
One thing is that, he listens.
He allowed me to finish what I was saying, even if I felt like I was rambling.
What I liked about our sessions was he guided me when I felt stuck.
Offering a lot of support by helping with the questions he asked.
How it applies to me or, what are the things that I can do to dig deep personally.
Really helping me think about things in a different way, like the other side of the coin.
A totally new perspective to help me understand and overcome my challenges.
Oh yeah, definitely.
There were a few times during our first session and Skill Sheet, I was like,
‘Huh, really? How’s that going to work?’
But I’d go away, and be curious about the information. ‘Why is it talking about this and that?’
Thinking, ‘I might not understand it right now, but it doesn't mean I'm not going to learn and understand it’.
So you self-reflect. You reflect on your experiences, and understand why the Skill Sheet is like it is.
It's asking you to know yourself, things that you're aware of, but you never really think about.
It allows you to look into yourself and dig deep.
One topic was an eye-opener for me, when it came to helping with my communication.
It gave me awareness of how I react and how to tackle things better.
And this doesn't just apply to work, it’s also on a personal level.
So that was a wake up call. A good revelation.
Another surprise, I remember attending a ‘how to present training’.
The advice was to think of yourself as an actor, ’Fake it to make it’.
But then it becomes performative, in my opinion.
Whereas, in Matt’s approach, you're always being yourself.
Let your natural self connect to others.
That's one of the things that made me realise how different Matt’s programme is.
I imagined it would be more about how my voice sounds and whether I'm articulating correctly. But it's not about that.
It's about how you are as a person.
If you need help with communication at work, book Matt the earliest you can.
Don’t hesitate.
I didn't imagine I would find somebody who’d create this type of communication coaching.
It's completely different to training, and not something I've seen in anything since I started working.
It allows you to grow your communication, not in a superficial way, but progress and still be your natural self. You learn more about yourself and how your mind works.
Treat it as an investment in yourself, and it’ll be worth it.
You know, investing takes time, but worth the effort.
I can confidently say that, ‘yes’, Matt helped me achieve the goals I wanted to achieve.
It's an eye-opener of an experience.
I'm really pleased with how much I grew.
Thank you Matt!
