Your body language at work,
does it help or sabotage?

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(Reflections of a Thoughtful Professional . . . )

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Sat at my desk, I see Bet and Jay across the room.
Stood just beyond the comfy seats.

I’m not spying, just watching.
Quite fascinated.

I can’t hear them.
But it’s interesting to observe their communication purely through their body language.

Like a tiny snapshot scene in a film.

Here’s what I see . . .

Bet, wearing one of her signature colourful orange jumpers, holds a laptop under her arm.
Jay in a navy polo shirt, hands in his pockets.

It looks like they are in mild disagreement.

Bet looks calm, unruffled, confident.
But Jay’s eyebrows are slightly pinched in a frown.

Bet then gently puts her laptop down on a nearby desk.
Her arms relax.
Her posture very open and she nods.
A nod that appears to say, ’I don’t agree Jay, but I get what you’re saying, and I’m listening’.

Jay then folds his arms, which suggests annoyance.

This is my interpretation of what I see, and I may be wrong.

But from my desk, it’s interesting to watch.‍

Their body language reveals to me what’s in their mind.‍

Bet is senior to Jay.
Bet displays restraint and emotional maturity.
Jay appears defensive. Like a kid that shouts ‘I’m right!’

What I realise is how many times I’ve seen this defensive body language.

A meeting where a client gives pushback.
Instead of leaning in, my colleague sits back and slowly folds their arms.

Watching Bet and Jay, I’m thinking to myself, if I were Jay, what subtle things would Bet be detecting?

Jay and I are quite similar in a lot of ways.
Like me, he cares what others think, and is sensitive.
Never forceful in conversation.

But in this conversation with Bet, does his body language support or sabotage him?

I’m asking myself . . . are there moments my body language shouts loud and clear to others in a way that doesn’t support me?

So . . .

Do folded arms have any role in my higher level communication?‍

Note to myself:‍

‘Beware my body language and what it communicates to others.
More Bet. Less Jay.’‍

Folding is for Origami.
Not my arms.